PDF Ebook The Family Silver: A Memoir of Depression and Inheritance, by Sharon O'Brien
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The Family Silver: A Memoir of Depression and Inheritance, by Sharon O'Brien
PDF Ebook The Family Silver: A Memoir of Depression and Inheritance, by Sharon O'Brien
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Review
"A rewarding and thought-provoking take." -- Los Angeles Times, July 30, 2004"An extraordinary combination of social and personal history....[O'Brien] is...a wise and compassionate narrator of her own rocky past." -- Chicago Tribune"With startling honesty and compassion, O'Brien unveils family stories of desire and despair." -- Library Journal, July 15, 2004
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From the Inside Flap
Finding herself struggling with depression ("like a rude houseguest, coming and going of its own accord"), Sharon O'Brien set out to understand its origins beyond the biochemical explanations and emotional narratives prevailing in contemporary American culture. Her quest for her inheritance took her straight into the pressures and possibilities of American culture, and then to the heart of her family—the generations who shaped and were shaped by one another and their moment in history. In The Family Silver, as O'Brien travels into her family's past, she goes beyond depression to discover courage, poetry, and grace.A compassionate and engaging writer, O'Brien uses the biographer's methods to understand her family history, weaving the scattered pieces of the past—her mother's memo books, her father's reading journal, family photographs, tombstones, dance cards, hospital records, the family silver—into a compelling narrative. In the lives of her Irish-American relatives she finds that the American values of upward mobility, progress, and the pressure to achieve sparked both desire and depression, following her family through generations, across the sea, from the Irish famine of the 1840s to Harvard Yard in the late 1960s."Many people who write stories of depression or other chronic illnesses tell tales of recovery in the upward-mobility sense, the 'once I was ill, but now I am well' formula that we may find appealing, but doesn't match the messiness of our lives," she writes. "Mine is not such a tale. But it is a recovery tale in another sense—a story of salvage, of rescuing stories from silence." Told with humor and honesty, O'Brien's story will captivate all readers who want to know how they, and their families, have been shaped by the past.
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Product details
Hardcover: 304 pages
Publisher: University Of Chicago Press; 1 edition (June 15, 2004)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0226616649
ISBN-13: 978-0226616643
Product Dimensions:
6 x 1.2 x 9 inches
Shipping Weight: 1.3 pounds
Average Customer Review:
4.3 out of 5 stars
9 customer reviews
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#914,691 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
Sharon O'Brian's memoir of her family history and how it links to her own experiences as a scholar and a person who deals with bouts of depression is both entertaining and though provoking. It made me want to explore the bright and dark links in my own family's history. He writing is beautiful.
"Let me get this straight. You think that if you take 10 mg of Prozac a day instead of 20 mg, you'll be twice as good a person. And if you ever had to take 40 mg a day instead of 20, you'd been twice as bad a person.""That's it," she said.Sharon O'Brien is a successful English professor, especially respected as a Willa Cather specialist. O'Brien also suffers from recurrent depression. A few years ago, she was working on two projects: a memoir of depression, and a history of her Irish-American family. Almost on their own, the two projects fused. The result is a magnificent book: original, touching, hilarious and even uplifting.THE FAMILY SILVER is a work of art, blindingly well written, and as crafted and enchanting as a Joseph Cornell shadow box. That is because O'Brien is first a writer, not some actress or some doctor. Also, unlike writers of other mental disorder memoirs, O'Brien is not in love with her illness. She doesn't allow IT to define HER (it helps that her first major bout came at the onset of middle age). But in retrospect, her own depression helps her understand and form a posthumous bond with her father, a brilliant man crippled by depression in his time. The insight she slowly gains, with therapy and the help of perceptive siblings, helps her deal with the decline of a once intimidating mother.THE FAMILY SILVER examines the many ways depression can creep on you. And I mean YOU.-Genetic familial predisposition (Sharon's father, some aunts...)-Family dynamics (Sharon's mother disowning her other daughter, feuding aunts)-Matching one's parents' expectations (Sharon expected to succeed where her parents failed)-Student stress (Harvard as a breeding ground for mood disorders)-Unstructured time (Teenage summers, then evenings as a single woman)-Academic pressure (Publish or perish)-Civilization (Be it Irish, Jewish, Armenian, Black... you understand)THE FAMILY SILVER is remarkable as well in the pitfalls it avoids. It is not a depressing read. It never elicits the "oh, cry me a river" reflex. O'Brien never wails "Why Me?" She is fully aware that she has led a basically charmed life, and that through her talent, she can turn her one lemon into the proverbial lemonade.In case you are curious about the clever title, THE FAMILY SILVER is more than just a symbol of family dysfunction. It is a huge set of fancy repoussé silverware which O'Brien's profligate vaudevilian grandfather brought back home, to the dismay of his parcimonious wife. Aunts bickered over the never used set for a whole generation. Today, defused, it is Sharon's everyday silverware.
I LOVED this book. Once I started reading, I couldn't put it down.I grew up in the same Boston suburb as the author, in a family spiraling in similar downward economic mobility, and I'm about the same age as the author, so many of her experiences mirrored my own. Her mirror brought me surprising clarity and compassion with regard to my parents' struggles and the impact their struggles had on my own growing up.I'm a psychologist now. When I look at this book from my professional viewpoint, as someone who treats and writes about depression, I also feel that it's a terrific resource. I will be recommending it to adults I treat for recurrent depressive episodes.The author's depressions started when she was an adolescent, and continued intermittently through much of her adult life. Watching her gain understanding and mastery over this depressive tendency gave me a deeper understanding of how I can help the depressed individuals with whom I work.BRAVO to the author, and thanks!
O'Brien has written a "Memoir of Depression and Inheritance" and she succeeds brilliantly in all of these intentions. This book works beautifully as a memoir, evoking in three dimensions, in colour and almost with smells and sounds, the world of upper-middle class expectations and genteel failure and the anxieties of her parents, and the alternative world of Elmira, which to me has the ring of a magic land. The people - mother, father, siblings, aunts - are whole and understandable and believable and sympathetic. The whole world within which the author strives to grow up is real and immediate on the page.More than a memoir, O'Brien has the ambition of understanding inheritance. Her book links behaviour and consequence and puts forward explanations and theories of action and traces the interconnecting threads that link relative with relative and past with outcome. This does not obtrude in the narrative: her skill in writing presents these insights as natural extensionds to the momentum of the absorbing story.The inheritance that is at the centre of O'Brien's understanding is the inheritance of depression. She addresses this with subtlety - she understands, and manages to present the complexity of inheritance and upbringing, accident and fate, biochemistry and environment, individual and social history. She is also alert to the accidents of everyday life that contribute to, and often trigger depression. I love her " `occasions of depression' which the vulnerable among us need to avoid or manage carefully." (p. 159) on the analogy of the "occasions of sin" that beset the unwary Roman Catholic.The framework for a real humane psychology should be biography, and the complex threads through which a biography is realized. O'Brien's beautiful book is a contribution to this true science of psychology. The fact that it is contained in this insightful memoir and is presented in superb language probably means that it will never feature in psychology reading lists, but it should (though the first reviewer here gives us hope!).
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